York Haunted Pub Crawl

Right so its been a while since I’ve blogged. Been meaning to do it for ages and I thought today’s post was quite suitable for attempting a come back. Last time I wrote a post it was about losing my cat Indy in the states. On top of all that I was also dealing with a bit of depression and what I found so odd but seemed to explain a lot, culture shock. While it’s not my first time living in the UK or experience things in the north. I was missing the normality I would get in St. Louis and not having a job and getting out of the house was also taking a toil. But now I have a job and a steady income I’m not only able to get out a hell of a lot more, I’m socializing a lot more. I still miss home obviously but I’m doing a lot more and spending so much time doing things and working that by the time I get home I am so worn out and sleeping within minutes of getting into bed. I might still be getting used to the work but I do like how quickly I’m going to sleep considering just a mere few months ago I was struggling to fall asleep at night.

Anyway last weekend my husband, me and our two friends David and Fiona went to York for an overnight trip. We did a haunted pub crawl that I’ve been wanting to do for nearly two years now. I got a booked called Haunted York and in the back with a list of haunted historic places there was a list of 10 pubs that were reported to be haunted with a map to help find our way. The only unfortunate thing was there was no stories as to their hauntings in the book. So I had to do a bit of research for all the different places. We didn’t get to go in all of them, there was only two we didn’t actually even get to see as they were the two farthest out of the main pubs. At least another 3 more that were too crowded to want to get a drink in as my husband and David joked, serving crap beer anyway being John Smiths pubs. Though I want to say one wasn’t and I really wanted to go in it but it was so crowded from a live band that was playing that I figured any spirits in that one wouldn’t be around.

So first we went to the Golden Fleece which had a doorman for such a tiny place. The fleece’s story I would write in my own words but I think its written quite well from a website I found.

Reputedly the most haunted pub in York, this early 16th century inn is certainly one of the oldest, having first been documented in 1503.

It is believed that no fewer than 15 spirits haunt this quaint unsuspecting pub. The most notable of these reports is the spirit of Lady Anne Peckett, the wife of the one time mayor of York, John Peckett. Many guests and staff have reported the sighting of a woman wandering the corridors of the inn, moving things around, and walking up and down the staircase in the dead of night.

Other ghosts include a man dressed in red coat uniform and holding a pistol. He’s known by people as One Eyed Jack, whether this is because he has been seen to wear a patch or is missing an eye is not known. He is also joined by a grumpy old man, both of whom are often sighted in the bottom bar area. A young boy is also seen in the top bar. It’s believed he is the ghost of a boy who was trampled to death by horses outside the inn sometime during the Victorian period.

After the Golden Fleece we got dinner, checked out Dean Court Hotel and decided we didn’t want to pay the prices but I will share the history I got from their website

As York is said to be one of the most haunted cities in the entire world, it’s no surprise that the Dean Court Hotel is haunted, primarily by a cleaner known as the ‘Mad Maid’. Mediums who have visited the hotel in the past came across the mad maid in the basement kitchen, where she told them that she used to work as a cleaner in the guesthouse that used to be next door to the hotel, that later became part of the hotel.

A number of other paranormal happenings have also been reported at the hotel, namely in room 36 on the third floor where most of the activity seems to be concentrated. Guests have reported doors slamming, feeling pressure on their chests late at night whilst they lie in bed, objects being moved around and out of their original positions and terribly cold spots in the rooms, even in the height of summer.

Not far from Dean Court Hotel was the York Arms which so happened to be a Sam Smith’s pub and is one our favourite breweries. Now the ghostly part of York Arms I could not find. The only thing I was able to find was that it was designed by J. P. Pritchett in 1838 and his work involved the demolition of the old Peter Prison and the mediaeval Minster Gate. We liked it there so much we stayed for two drinks. It was nice and quiet which was surprising for a Saturday night. After that we went to one of my favourite pubs Ye Olde Starre Inn in the shambles and that was our first bit of actual ghostly activity.

Ye Olde Starre Inne dates back to 1644, however historians believe the cellar is much older than this. It is from this cellar that most of the activity occurs, with screams and groans often heard. It was here were Royalist soldiers were treated during the inns’ time as a temporary hospital during the Civil War.

Another frequent experience is the sighting of an old lady wearing black clothes. There isn’t much known about the identity of the woman, or how she died, but she is often seen on the staircase.

Perhaps one of the strangest hauntings in this list, is the ghosts of two black cats that reportedly haunt this pub. Local legend says the cats were bricked up between the pillar between the door and the bar. On several occasions, customers have brought their dogs in with them, and whilst having their drinks the dogs have growled, snarled, and in some instances have bolted towards the pillar, with one dog knocking itself out doing so!

The tradition of burying cats in the walls is a tradition that goes back a long way throughout Yorkshire. It is believed this ritual protects the building against both fire and bad luck.

Now I took these pictures before I read the story and saw the first smudge and thought it was the cord of the camera in the picture so I took two more knowing I had a tight hand on the cord and there was still that moving orb. Mike and I believe it might have been the poor cats that were bricked in the pillar. Our friend David kept making fun of the idea so I think that might be why its trying to pick his nose :p It might also explain why I always feel so at home in that place because not being a fan of crowds but being a very big fan of cats, I am never in a rush to move on. I firmly believe that’s the cats visiting our table but then moved on when Mike took over the camera. I did take a few more shots too just to see if it was a flaw with the camera but there was nothing and rather than share an odd picture of my purse I didn’t add it on here. So yeah ghostly cat tails in that place with orbs in lots of other places. Next was The Punch Bowl (not the Wetherspoons one) which also had some orbs in it. They stayed with Fiona mostly.

Said to be haunted, The Punch Bowl has been a pub for over four centuries, or perhaps we should say pubs, as we have suffered two major fires. We have a historical connection with the Whig Party from the 17th Century. Punch was the preferred drink of the Whigs, whilst the Tories liked their claret. Any pub displaying a punch bowl sign was therefore declaring its political allegiance.

As with many of the old pubs in York, the Punch bowl is host to a couple of ghostly figures. In the past, the pub was renown as a brothel. One story is that one women rejected the advances of a client, who then chased her around the pub to one of the rooms where he strangled her to death.

Her ghostly steps and voice have often been heard by the staff and customers. The second being that of a previous landlord who died during a fire in the pub.

After The Punch Bowl we tried to go to the Roman Bath which has a museum downstairs with the Roman bath that was found and is on display. Obviously by this point we couldn’t see the it and it was really crowded so we decided to move on and try it another time. Next was The Old White Swan, we sat at a round table by one of the fireplaces, it was busy but the place was large enough for the crowd. I ended up spilling my cider into my purse which had all my electronics so I had to quickly clean it out. I wasn’t the only one to spill my drink there either so I think it was safe to say we were pretty sloshed. Anyhow the story is here, comes from their website.

Part of a collection of buildings dating back to the 16th century, the Old White Swan is also one of the oldest in the city, and with that comes the history and the stories of hauntings. It is believed that the pub is haunted by a group of papists who have been seen gathering round the fire in the early hours of the morning. The fire itself is often re-ignited by itself after staff have extinguished it shortly before.

Another piece of strange phenomena that occurs at this pub are the reports of furniture being moved and in come cases thrown and toppled over by unseen hands. Muffled voices are also often heard, and the sound of footsteps are a regular occurrence.

The Old White Swan is a collection of buildings with a rather colourful history that dates from the 16th Century. We are one of York’s oldest pubs and are said to be haunted. Buildings at the rear of our courtyard date to medieval times and in 1781, the world’s tallest man, Mr O’Brian, was exhibited here at the pub. O’Brian stood 8 feet tall and the then landlord charged onlookers a shilling.

While I don’t know if the fire we sat by is the one they talk about, there is an orb in one of the photos. So again we didn’t plan to sit by one of the haunted areas before we read the story yet still managed to. Oddly coincidental.

After the white swan we made our way to The Snickleway Inn which sadly was the one with the live band and crammed with people. So we stood outside while I read the story and it took a lot of effort not to just go right in after reading what can happen there.

Situated in the historic centre of York, the Snickleway Inn is one of the oldest pubs in the city with parts of the building dating back to the 15th century. The building was not always linked to the pub trade; evidence suggests it may have once been used as a brothel as well as being the Royalist powder magazine during the English Civil War.

In addition to being one of York’s oldest pubs, the Snickleway Inn is also reputedly one of the most haunted. Derek Acorah names the pub as being amongst Britain’s 100 scariest places to visit, thought to be haunted by at least 5 spirits.

The ghosts include Mrs. Tulliver and her cat, Seamus. Some customers claim to have felt the cat rubbing against their legs. The ghost of a young girl has been seen sitting on the pub stairs. She is the daughter of a past landlord who ran outside into the road one day and was killed by a brewer’s dray. An elderly gent is said to sit on the barrels in the cellar and has been known to throw tools at certain members of staff when they go down there.

Now the part I can’t remember is if we got some food on the way back or before we made our way there but we decided to go to some places that weren’t on the list as the last two were too far out from where we were and our hotel. One place wouldn’t let us in because I forgot my passport in the hotel which was understandable but hey not every place has a doorman so we went to The Red Lion which everyone but me wanted to go to first as they were saying its a pub crawl but it wasn’t on my list and I wanted a haunted pub as we all agreed to do. So I may have pitched a mini fit at the beginning to make sure we stuck with the plan. But now that there was plenty of booze in me and we were pretty much done with our list we went there and it was quite a nice place. Could definitely tell it had some history to it. I’ve yet to see what there is about the place but I wouldn’t be surprised if there was something. After that we finished our night with the Wetherspoons that was connected to the hotel. And of course before heading to bed we raided the vending machine just in the lobby. It sadly was not as pleasant a night of sleep as I would have hoped because we had the window open in our room which you could hear traffic and people out later than us. Then very early that morning a family next door woke up us. Or really the 3 kids and dad trying desperately to get the ready for the day. One crying and two were bouncing around, how do I know this? Because the walls were so fucking thin!!! Or they were just ridiculously loud. Which is highly possible as Fiona and David heard them and they were a few doors down and not connected by the wall that we were. What was funny was when the father left the room with one of the kids and the kid started to say something the father immediately hushed the kid. And it was like yeah bit late for that! So we ended our time in York by having a nice breakfast at Bills and our server telling us about more haunted pubs when she asked about our visit to York. And I had just enough time to quickly nip into The Cat Gallery to grab Grey some of his catnip mice. It was a great trip and I know we’ll be visiting the other two places as well as the new ones we were told about. Oh and I’ll share the stories for the two we didn’t get to go to. Which were The Black Swan and The Cock and Bottle. And there I shall leave you with the last of the stories and pictures.

Cock and Bottle

Georgie Porgie

Georgie Porgie pudding and pie

Kissed the girls and made them cry

When the boys came out to play

Georgie Porgie ran away

George Villiers, Duke of Buckingham (1592-1628) was the bisexual lover of King James I. By no means monogamous, Villiers also had affairs with ladies at Court as well as with the wives and daughters of powerful nobles. It is believed he used his relationship with the King to force his attention on unwilling ladies:

“Kissed the girls and made them cry”

Whilst avoiding prosecution or retaliation. Parliament finally ordered James I to stop intervening on his lover’s behalf causing all the jealous husbands to vow to get their revenge, so…

“Georgie Porgie ran away”

Said to be the home to the ghost of George Villiers, the Duke of Buckingham, who was rumoured to have been made famous by the Georgie Porgie nursery rhyme.

The Black Swan

This solid oak 17th century inn was originally built in 1417 and was used as a family residence. However, the pub as you see it today wasn’t built until sometime during the 17th century.

The Black Swan is certainly one of the oldest buildings in our list, and it also has some interesting reports of paranormal goings on. One of which is the sighting of a Chaplinesque looking figure that wears a bowler hat, pacing around the rooms of the pub as if he’s waiting for someone to arrive. After a while he normally disappears!

The ghost of a beautiful young woman with long black hair and wearing a white dress is also seen. She is often seen looking towards the fireplace as if in deep thought.

Perhaps the strangest of all the haunting at the Black Swan, is the male legs that have often been seen walking around the landlord’s living quarters.

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Welcome Home?

So I’m home now. I got home safe. Though it doesn’t really feel like home anymore.

I have to say it has been so weird being back. I came home and the smell in the house was unfamiliar and not that pleasant. It was probably a mixture of stale cigarette smoke and the smell of animals. My room for the most part didn’t look that different. Just had a load of stuff my mom put in there but hadn’t gotten around to putting away. I filled two bags yesterday of stuff I want to get rid of. One was trash the other was clothes for donation. As soon as today is over with I’ll be working on the desk filled with my mom’s stuff so I have spot to put things. Do really wish I had cable in my room again. The converter box my parents had been disconnected since I wasn’t here and they got me something to watch basic cable with but the damn thing turned off on its own last night to save energy and I haven’t been able to get it on again. I got two litter boxes in my room now. I don’t think I need two in here but what can ya do?

My flight home was hell. I was stuck between two people. One was a nice English woman who I didn’t speak to much but was kind. The other was some American guy that didn’t say two words to me and kept writing stuff down and making charts and drawings and wouldn’t stop moving around! I couldn’t watch the inflight movie which I had a feeling would happen but I couldn’t really pull out my laptop to watch one of the two films I got. I did watch them when I got home but I read a book, did some word searches and listen to music most of the time on the flight.

As far as me crying I did okay until I got on the plane from Chicago to St. Louis. I was having an issue with getting to my seat. I thought I was looking at the right one but I’m beginning to wonder if I was one row off. Anyway I ended up being the last one seated and had a flight attendant get a bit snippy with my row since they were letting me in. I felt it was unnecessary. That set me off with missing Mike. Then I when I saw my mom I was set off again. Yesterday I did okay for the most part but that would be cause I kept myself busy. But today I have feeling it’s going to be hard. I’d much rather just stay home and hid under the covers but we’re going to my aunts. I almost want to drive myself so I can go home when I want to but it’s been over a year since I drove.

I’m finding that I don’t really know what to do with myself. Beyond cleaning my room there’s not much to do. I’ve watched a few films, cleaned parts of the house while my parents were at work. Looked at wedding stuff online and for the venue and did do a little job searching. I don’t really know where to start with the job searching, I’m looking at retail stuff but also library work but I don’t want to do too much searching before I go see my former boss that has offered to help look at my resume.

I supposed to hang out with a friend and one of my bridesmaids on Sunday. I don’t know what to do. It’s really hard to do anything when you have no money. I do about 25 dollars but that’s it. And I’d rather use it on something I need. Plus I got stuff I need to get and I wonder if I should wait for that.

Anyway I might do some cleaning before we go.

Oh yeah my cat Indy (who I swear not only lost weight but shrunk!) has been so happy to have me back. She looked shocked when I came home but has been staying with me most of the time. Twice I’ve woken up at 4am with her sleeping right on top of my bladder, which has also make my need to pee more needed. My jet lag is kind of eh. Tuesday I took a nap when I got home and then went to bed after like 10 but I was awake at 4am, got up to go to the bathroom and wasn’t able to go back to sleep. Last night I went to bed at 9:30 and then stayed in bed after I woke up. I don’t remember if I fell back to sleep but I was up at 7. I have been taking it easy.

Anyway this might be my last post on here. I need to get sorted and then I think about the other blog. Hope everyone has a good Thanksgiving.

Mix in the Good with the Bad

Things have been up and down lately.

I was hoping to post some photos I took of Fountains Abbey on Sunday but I haven’t edited them yet so it might be a bit before I do. But I got a lot on my mind that I just need to let out. On the job front I really thought I had a possible job but it’s starting to look like my last chance is going out the window because I never had a need for a national insurance number until now. It will be crunch time but hopefully I can get all the information they need as well as pass the tests to get a temporary job so I can actually buy my own plane ticket home as well as have a bit left over. But it’s starting to look like not only will I be going home sooner and poorer but not have any real kind of job.

Beyond that I did have some good personal news. We got the venue for the UK reception booked and we’re going to do our Save the Dates this weekend. We meant to start working on a budget but we were pretty busy last weekend and not really in the house. So sometime this week or over the weekend we will. The reception actually looks like a nice place, we like the feel of it and it looks nice.

But then last night I got some news that really threw me off. It was like getting sucker punched and then hit again for a knock out. One of my friends from back home who I’ve known for years and years had some bad news for me. A mutual friend who shall remain nameless has been accused of murder. It’s someone who has had a bit of a troubled past but one I didn’t know much about. I don’t know the motive or if there was one or if it was true. All I know was a guy that seemed genuinely nice and I gave a ride home a few times (he didn’t drive) is now in jail for murder. Based on some their past issues, if it’s true I don’t think they should go to jail but a psychiatric hospital. Now I’m not normally one who would generally be okay with this but I know this person is troubled and based on what he may have done, it’s got to be screwing with his head. My friend that told me this is going to see what he can do and I guess possibly talk to him. It’s just completely mind boggling.

Then he gave me some news of his own that just breaks my heart for him. He’s getting divorced and from the sound of it he will remain friends with the ex and try to see the kids as much as possible. But he’s having to move on from his current situation to another. I don’t know the circumstances of what happened but it makes me sad to see that this is happening to him. I am of course biased in the situation because he is my friend and I know he’s got to be hurt. But I know I can’t judge either since I wasn’t in the situation. It was honestly one of those situations where I thought it would work because I know how much of a decent guy he is. But even nice people get divorced. I’m not one that generally believes in ending a marriage unless there is abuse involved. I’m also probably one of many that wants to just grab hold and slap across the face one of many celebrities that rush into things and two seconds later things are over.

My fiance and I have talked before about if things ever ended for us then that’s it we would never get married again. Because we both don’t want that and in many ways we are insecure about the other based on past experiences. He’s had more than one girlfriend get bored with him. I think he still expects it with me sometimes but then he sees how I get when we talk about being separated from each other with the long distance (just the thought of it happening sooner today cause me to break down in tears) and we see how much we get along. We can be stupidly immature with each and laugh about it and there is no one else we have ever been able to do that with. I’m not one that generally believes in fate and destiny and such. I’m more of a “you choose your own destiny” kind of person and I wouldn’t have it any other way with him. I can still majorly crush on celebrities like Gerard Butler or Michael Fassbender and it doesn’t bother him and he can do likewise.

Anyhow I’m getting past the point I was wanting to make about my friend. He’ll find someone, that right person that is for him. He’s still young and he’s already got plans for his new situation so he’s a lot better off then someone with no plan. His situation as well as the other thing that happen makes it hard for me to be happy about plans with Mike. Because in my ideal world everything is happy and great and hunky dory. But in the real world it doesn’t happen that way.

So I might have go home soon. I am looking forward to it in a lot of ways but I’m also going to miss being around Mike so much. At least we’ll get Christmas together. That’s a positive way to look at it.

Things are Looking Up!

So I was debating about whether or not to write a post today since I wanted to wait until I found out about the wedding venue but I think I’ll save that for my other blog.

So It’s Tuesday, Friday is when Grey was taken home. I was pretty miserable Friday and Saturday. We had a BBQ Saturday evening and right before that I moved all my stuff out of my student accommodation. I don’t really miss the place to be honest. But it got my mind off of Grey. I was pretty cranky at first cause I was feeling stressed about where to put my stuff, my lack of money to be able to send stuff home, missing Grey and needing to work on my dissertation. But a funny thing happened. One of my fiance’s friends knew something was up, I was upstairs sulking (I almost didn’t want to come down for the BBQ) and he came up and asked me what’s up. And this is one of those guys that’s kind of manly and macho and likes being a guy’s guy. And he just sat there and listened to me talk about what was bugging me. He listen to me about Grey, and I will never understand why but he’s afraid of cats, so even though he didn’t care that much about the cat story, he listened.

Mike I think the most shocked because I was generally fine after that (until I wanted to go to bed and relax but they were all still here enjoying the fire pit but I’ll just leave that to me being tired since I was up early) and the fact that who it was that got me out of my mood. If he had tried that it would have been worse. I do feel bad about that sometimes but I do sometimes need to sulk a bit before I start feeling better and I also need to be left alone when I sulk. Now Mike wants to fix everything so when doesn’t leave me to sulk long enough it tends to backfire.

But now that it’s Tuesday, I am doing better. Grey hasn’t come back like we predicted, though not to say he might not. Maybe he’s just happy to be home and maybe she’s actually letting him stay in the house longer. Missing him is a bit different to missing any of my other animals. I know he’s safe and it’s not like he passed away. Mike also said we now know I can love an animal as much as I loved Missy. So maybe in a few years I’ll get to have my own cat like that again.

So my dissertation is going better than I thought. I was getting kind of worried for a bit because I was taking longer than I had planned with my transcripts but yesterday I spent the day working on a few things and working out what I needed to have for a complete dissertation. I’m actually about halfway (if not more) through with it. The beginning will be very easy to write since it’s already partially written from when I did my proposal and the biggest part of it, my lit review is basically done though it still needs editing and bits added to it. I got my reference list done a while ago. My data analysis is going smoothly as well. So really the only parts I need to work on and will go smoothly as well since I know what I’m talking about is my reflections and conclusions. I do need to do a bit of work on the methodology but that’s just making it better based on what my supervisor told me. And I got all kinds of information to use for my presentation. So I’m pretty happy with the way things are going, I think my project planning was a bit unrealistic but at least I realize I’m not behind. Anyhow I should probably start working on it now. I want to see what I can get done in the next few weeks before I need to seriously edit stuff.

So things are looking up. Pretty soon I’ll be coming home and this blog will be done. But that doesn’t mean I’m  going to stop blogging. I got the wedding blog now. Maybe I’ll just be writing one about everyday life and living between the two countries. Who knows!

Update On The Dog

So a few days ago I wrote a rant about how angry I was at a “friend” for his behavior towards his ex and towards me because he wanted to get rid of her dog but not give it back to her.

After having a long discussion with “Jenny” and thinking of all the different options to try to contact him since I was an expendable friend, she realized she was going to have to call the police which she really didn’t want to do. Despite how Chad was treating her, she still wished him the best and wanted to do things the nice way. After speaking to the police who told that they could get the dog but she would have to press charges (which she didn’t want to do), she decided to email him in hopes that he would read it. He did and though claim he wouldn’t respond to her threat of legal action (responding to the email is responding dummy) he (a man in his 30s, married with a kid) and his parents (more likely the reasonable ones) decided they were going to (graciously *eye roll*) give her the dog. As long as she met a few of his conditions. Conditions that for the most part a given, though only one I saw as something she couldn’t completely control. He didn’t want her to contact him or anyone else associated with her. Me and her both knew I was included in this especially since he has ignored my first email after he deleted me asking what it was I did wrong.

I have considered telling him what a child he is and if were the better man, he wouldn’t be acting the way he is, but I decided against it because I am better than that. And I also know I would get no satisfaction from sending him the email since he would most likely not respond. I’m just content to know that Mr. Domino is home with his real family, a family that loves him and has time for him. Jenny has done a lot of thinking as well. And something she put out to the world of Facebook really touched me. I’ll repost what it was she said.


“I have learned a lot in the past weeks. I realized the idea of someone disliking or hating me is my kryptonite. It makes me panicy and sick to my stomach and I have to know why and what I can do to fix it and that I will go to no length to fix it even at a major cost to myself (probably not a good thing). I learned that for some, a decade of friendship is worth less than 1000 bucks. I have also learned that to some people they have friends that are easily expendable. I’ve learned that even though someone seems cool and like a friend they would throw you under a bus just to get ahead. And that some friends feel you are just not good enough for those important moments in their life. But on the other hand I’ve also learned that if I occasionally grow a pair I’ll get what I want/deserve. And best of all I learned that despite how some people view friendship, there are still the few out there that are such true and honest friends that they will take a punch to the gut and a kick to the face for you and still come up smiling.”


I would gladly take more than that for her. She’s been one of the kindest people I’ve ever met and has a true heart. She doesn’t take sides or judge people for something they can’t help. And I’m thankful for her friendship. It is nice to know when others get you down, there is someone like her who will be there to make you feel better and be the voice of reason.


Domino with one of the kids. A happy family!


But at least in this case there is a happy ending to the story. Yay for Domino!

So Stinking Mad!!!!

I need to rant for a little bit. I was in the middle of my work and decided to take a break and what happened has made me so angry I need to vent.

Let’s start with this morning when I got on Facebook to catch up with what happened after I went to bed. Since I’m 6 hours ahead of most of my friends and family I go to bed before them. And since today is a holiday I’m sure a lot of them were up late. As I was going through the different posts I noticed one from a friend who was also an old co-worker. He was putting a post out saying he was looking for a new home for his dog D. I read a few comments after that and thought, wait I thought that was Jenny’s dog (I’ve changed her name so I don’t bring too much attention to her in case anyone on FB reads this). So I sent her an email asking if she knew about the dog and if it was the same one I remember. Back when I was still hanging out with her, well before I came to England, she and the other guy, let’s call him Chad, had just broken up after being together for close to a decade. They were too poor to move out and also had a mutual friend living with them. Anyway there was two dogs, one was hers and the other was the mutual friend’s. I don’t quite know the circumstances to their break up besides what she had told me, but after I lost contact with her because we both became rather busy, things got worse. I’m guessing she couldn’t afford to keep the dog so she let him have D. Then she met someone else who she is still with and now has a kid with. He met someone else as well and much to my surprise, got married and had a kid as well (Chad always told me he never wanted to get married or have kids, I think he was really badly burned from an ex of his before Jenny’s). So as surprised as I was by this I was also happy for him. He seemed to be doing what he wanted in life and bettering himself. Jenny was as well in finding a happy relationship and realizing she could have another kid. He had some problems way back that made her think she couldn’t have anymore. She already has some kids from when she was younger.

I knew things were kind of shaky with them at the end. Whenever I would see Chad when I was visiting Jenny, he was always nice to me and acted civil. But Jenny told me, he only ever did that when others were around. I can’t really remember what she said he was like but it kind of surprised me. And since I don’t know both sides of the story and it was none of my business, I stayed out and remained friendly with them both. However today when I saw the post I thought Jenny should know. They don’t speak anymore and according to Jenny he has her blocked on FB. Recently they had a mutual friend that passed away and Jenny was quite upset over it because she has lost contact with him and many others because of what happened with Chad in the end. She had been planning on contacting the friend who had passed away only to find out he had died. I talked to her about it since I saw similar posts by both of them. So figuring Jenny didn’t know and deserved to because I never saw a dog so happy as he was when Jenny was babying him and talking to him (he quite a big dog too and yet is just such a softie). I found out from Jenny that she does want him and suggested she try to contact him but because of the block she can’t. So I told her I would make the suggestion for her. I also asked her what had happened between them because blocking her since pretty serious. Before I got an answer I left the comment on his page about contacting Jenny about the dog because I was pretty sure she would love him back.

And then I got a response from her. She doesn’t even know what happened between them. All she knows is that he blamed her (I’m not sure what, maybe the end of their relationship even though he dumped her and she was completely blindsided by it) and thinks she’s the devil. It was really hard to hear that and not be able to give her any kind of physical comfort. I remember when I found out they had broken up, I went over to hers immediately with food and crap and we just talked for hours in her living room.

The funny thing is when I was friends with Chad first before I was ever friends with Jenny. In fact I used to have a crush on Chad (Why I don’t know anymore cause he’s not as nice as he appears) and was jealous cause he had started seriously dating her. But then I met her and thought she was really cool and she was someone I could hang out with and talk to. To me she became more my friend than he ever was. But I still thought he was a nice decent guy and he was also a co-worker I got along with.

So the next thing that happened kind of surprised me and greatly angered me. I checked to see if he had responded at all and found that I couldn’t see. Because I was no longer friends with him. In a span of 2 hours of asking him a question to checking again on Facebook, he had deleted me. No response, no reason, just deleted me.

In a way I’m kind of hurt, I didn’t realize me even mentioning her name could cause such a reaction. I know I hadn’t seen him in ages and only talked to him sometimes on Facebook but I didn’t realize I was so expendable.

And then at the same time, I’m thinking, WHAT A FUCKING DICK!!!!

I decided to email him and ask him nicely what it was I did wrong but to be perfectly honest. I know I didn’t do anything wrong. I just made the mistake of thinking him a decent person. His true colors have been shown and his “nice guy” thing has been found wanting. It’s a shame I had to find out the hard way that he was never my friend, or at least stopped being my friend a very long time ago. Poor D. I hope he gets a better home than that dipshit.

Yeah I’m still mad, he completely threw me off my concentration for my literature review. Dick. (Okay I’m done with the name calling, just had to add that one in for good measure) *insert angry steaming smily face*

Happy Independence Day! :p