Welcome Home?

So I’m home now. I got home safe. Though it doesn’t really feel like home anymore.

I have to say it has been so weird being back. I came home and the smell in the house was unfamiliar and not that pleasant. It was probably a mixture of stale cigarette smoke and the smell of animals. My room for the most part didn’t look that different. Just had a load of stuff my mom put in there but hadn’t gotten around to putting away. I filled two bags yesterday of stuff I want to get rid of. One was trash the other was clothes for donation. As soon as today is over with I’ll be working on the desk filled with my mom’s stuff so I have spot to put things. Do really wish I had cable in my room again. The converter box my parents had been disconnected since I wasn’t here and they got me something to watch basic cable with but the damn thing turned off on its own last night to save energy and I haven’t been able to get it on again. I got two litter boxes in my room now. I don’t think I need two in here but what can ya do?

My flight home was hell. I was stuck between two people. One was a nice English woman who I didn’t speak to much but was kind. The other was some American guy that didn’t say two words to me and kept writing stuff down and making charts and drawings and wouldn’t stop moving around! I couldn’t watch the inflight movie which I had a feeling would happen but I couldn’t really pull out my laptop to watch one of the two films I got. I did watch them when I got home but I read a book, did some word searches and listen to music most of the time on the flight.

As far as me crying I did okay until I got on the plane from Chicago to St. Louis. I was having an issue with getting to my seat. I thought I was looking at the right one but I’m beginning to wonder if I was one row off. Anyway I ended up being the last one seated and had a flight attendant get a bit snippy with my row since they were letting me in. I felt it was unnecessary. That set me off with missing Mike. Then I when I saw my mom I was set off again. Yesterday I did okay for the most part but that would be cause I kept myself busy. But today I have feeling it’s going to be hard. I’d much rather just stay home and hid under the covers but we’re going to my aunts. I almost want to drive myself so I can go home when I want to but it’s been over a year since I drove.

I’m finding that I don’t really know what to do with myself. Beyond cleaning my room there’s not much to do. I’ve watched a few films, cleaned parts of the house while my parents were at work. Looked at wedding stuff online and for the venue and did do a little job searching. I don’t really know where to start with the job searching, I’m looking at retail stuff but also library work but I don’t want to do too much searching before I go see my former boss that has offered to help look at my resume.

I supposed to hang out with a friend and one of my bridesmaids on Sunday. I don’t know what to do. It’s really hard to do anything when you have no money. I do about 25 dollars but that’s it. And I’d rather use it on something I need. Plus I got stuff I need to get and I wonder if I should wait for that.

Anyway I might do some cleaning before we go.

Oh yeah my cat Indy (who I swear not only lost weight but shrunk!) has been so happy to have me back. She looked shocked when I came home but has been staying with me most of the time. Twice I’ve woken up at 4am with her sleeping right on top of my bladder, which has also make my need to pee more needed. My jet lag is kind of eh. Tuesday I took a nap when I got home and then went to bed after like 10 but I was awake at 4am, got up to go to the bathroom and wasn’t able to go back to sleep. Last night I went to bed at 9:30 and then stayed in bed after I woke up. I don’t remember if I fell back to sleep but I was up at 7. I have been taking it easy.

Anyway this might be my last post on here. I need to get sorted and then I think about the other blog. Hope everyone has a good Thanksgiving.

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Decisions, Decisions…

So I’ve been engaged just over 2 weeks. My wedding planning has kind of been non existent. For good reason too. I’m completely delved into my dissertation. I’m supposed to be working on my lit review but have also been working on my interviews with writing them up and scheduling them. I think it’s going pretty well. I’ve been working during the day by reading articles and taking notes. Hoping by next week I can start the writing process. Hopefully I’ll have a decent draft done by the time I meet with my supervisor again.

But I realized over the weekend that with me working on this and trying to get a job (because my funds are super low) that I can’t even consider planning for my wedding. It’s not such a bad thing though. It’s one less thing to worry about and we’re not really sure what we’re going to do anyway.

The plans we have so far is that in December I’ll go home and he’ll come with for a visit. Then for the next year I’ll be in the states again and he’ll be here in the UK and we’ll be working on saving up money for the wedding and paying bills. We’re planning for Fall 2013 from the looks of it and we’re gonna make it small and simple because we both want to get out debt sooner so we can have a nice live together raising a family. But we’re going to get married in the states where I’m from because it would be easier for us to have him just come over for the wedding. And then I could come over there because we’ll be married. And we’ll live in the UK for a few years so he can save up enough money  for us to move back and spend some quality time with his family.

It’s a pretty good plan and hopefully it will work. Don’t know what I’ll do about my stuff with my parents. Most likely just have them pack it up and I’ll deal with it when I’m back. Hopefully I can get my mom over to the UK for a visit. I’d really hate to leave my cat though. I’ve already left her with my mom to take care of and I miss that whiny little stinker. I know I’ve put a lot of stress on her and she is getting older. So bringing her to the UK after a year might not be a good idea plus if we’re living with his parents (to save money) three cats would be a bit much and they probably wouldn’t get along. But who knows. I’ll cross the bridge when I come to it.

Anyway for now it’s all about work work work and then come the end of September I can do the fun stuff. I can’t wait to get together with my friends back in the states and plan the wedding. Means I can bake stuff and try stuff out for ideas and plan. It’s a shame I’ll have to plan the wedding with my fiance long distance. But in the long run it will work out.

Anyway wish us luck on our plans and me luck with my dissertation writing! 🙂

I’ll Always Remember Blackpool…

I shall always remember Blackpool. It wasn’t glamorous and the piers are nice and historic and it was cool seeing the tide come in but comparing it to that I think I prefer Scarborough for the coast part. The reason I will remember Blackpool though has to do with one special person and an important question he asked. Or rather wrote in the sand.

On Tuesday evening Mike and I went to the beach so I could take a few photos of the sun setting and the piers lit up while the tide was nearly done coming in. While I was I was taking these photos he had asked me not to turn around for a few minutes. I had an idea of what he meant but it built up excitement still. When I turned around he had written in the sand, “Marry me?” and was on one knee holding up the ring. I was very happy to say yes though I think at the time I just squeaked and hugged him because a few minutes later I said, just in case you didn’t realized I’m saying yes. So I’m engaged. It took me about a day to get used to wearing the ring. It’s definitely one I love. Don’t know if it’s what you would call a traditional engagement ring but I think it’s very me.

 

 

Mike and I don’t have a lot of plans at the moment. I’m still working on school stuff and he’s got bills to pay off before he can consider moving to the US. That said he could pay them from the states but our wedding wouldn’t be any time soon. It will likely not be until 2014 or 2015. I do know I want it in the fall, like late September or early October and I want the wedding to be outside but I want the reception inside. It won’t be a big wedding since a lot of Mike’s side might not be able to make it plus it would more expensive if it was bigger. I’d probably invite more people to the reception rather than the wedding. Anyway I got plenty of time to plan and probably shouldn’t make any major plans until I’m settled again back home. Just wanted to give a quick update and once I’m recovered a bit more I’ll post photos.

Mike and I at Pleasure Beach amusement park.